12. "You bring everyone a lot of joywhen you leave the room.". Your secrets are always safe with me. 73. 50. 0 Comments. Because you've made a part of me move without even touching it. You are about to exceed the limits of my medication. Please tell me you dont plan to home-school your kids. Guy: Do you want to dance?Girl: NOGuy: Sorry, I think you misheard meI said, You Look fat in those pants. Teacher: "Why are you talking during my lesson?" Id give you a slap, but thatd be animal abuse. Press Enter / Return to begin your search. You are so old, when you were a kid rainbows were black and white. You are so old, you sat next to Jesus in school. You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you. You are so stupid, youd trip over a cordless phone. You are so stupid that if I gave you a penny for your intelligence, Id get change back. You may be a beautiful person on the inside, too bad you were born on the outside! 4. Dont worry about me. Youre basically bathed in oil. 40. instead of listening to your opinion. Some people are rude. You bring everyone so much joy when you. Everything happens for a reason, but sometimes the reason is that you are stupid and make bad decisions. Your secrets are always safe with me. To this end, I leave you with the exquisite words of Vince Lombardi. Guy: So what do you do for a living?Girl: Female impersonator. 93. How did you get here? If I throw a stick, will you leave? Oh wait, it's not coming off. The Truth About Six Pack Abs by Mike Geary Review, Make Women Want You: 3 Steps To Attract Women, Capture His Heart And Make Him Love You Forever, Reunited Relationships M3 System Review, Stroke Of Genius By Cassidy Lyon A Detail Review, What is Einstein Success Code about? Good Comebacks You Can Use In An Argument Today Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the 3rd ones for you. Stupidity is not a crime so you are free to go. 7. Youre the reason they invented double doors. on It is all about reading a room and assessing a situation when you have to decide between a clever or witty response. Worry about your eyebrows. Whenever I see you, middle finger gets an erection. If your brain were dynamite, there wouldnt be enough to blow your hat off. Is that comment meant to offend me? 101. you are as interesting as with the documentary on the soil. I was today years old when I realized I didnt like you. I will ignore you so hard you will start doubting your existence. 3. Ive heard youre quite the ladies man. Well, Id better go find the best looking guy then! "Your wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead." You're the reason God created the middle finger. I consider you something a vulture would eat. Then we are content to be alone. Whats the latest dope besides you? Whatever anyone says to you goes in one ear and out the other because nothing is blocking traffic. When I want your opinion, Ill rattle your cage! When they made you, they broke the mold and beat the mold maker. When you die, Id like to go to your funeral, but Ill probably have to go to work that day. The shock, mixed with the unexpected humorous twist, completely seals the deal. The salt on this food is enough to kill an earthworm. Ive heard you like to talk big. "You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing." "Your ass must be jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth." Download "Dirty mind" Sound: Download Sound. If you need anything feels free to contact me. 62. Spending time with friends and family. Learn from your parents mistake Use birth control. I see no evil, and I definitely dont hear your evil. You bring everyone so much joy! This witty response takes the tactic of pretending the offer was genuine and kicks it up a notch by presenting the next step to make it happen. A fool is the same all year round, and we celebrate you on April 1st. Good Comebacks 1. Youre so dumb, I bet your dog teaches you tricks. Beam your phone up with these great ringtones from the Star Trek tv series. Yeah, I bet you had a lot of stuff beaten out of you as a kid. Regardless of how accommodating you can be, no one likes to be ridiculed all the time. 22 Perverted Pics To look At While Alone. You're twice the d*ck you were yesterday. The mirror broke when you looked at it. I can explain it to you, but I cant understand it for you. 98. Guy: Would you like to dance?Girl: Not with you.Guy: Oh, come on. I should have pulled out and shot you on the wall. Boy: Fuck you, you little bitch! There have been new tracks added. If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary forms. Mind if I ask where the OFF button for your mouth is? Your mind is on vacation but your mouth is working overtime. I never pick on somebody who is unarmed. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You'd leave if I threw a stick, right? Man: "If you were my wife, I'd drink it." Someday youll go far and I really hope you stay there. For example: Suck my d*ck I got a 60 on the test.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_3',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_4',106,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');.medrectangle-3-multi-106{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. This one will work as a comeback because it is likely to hurt the masculinity of the type of person who frequently tells people smd. Is your family tree a cactus? Tall Black Guy: "You're short, Do you work for Willy Wonka." If I wanted to hear from an asshole, Id fart. I think that was the elevator because you're not on my level! Did someone leave your cage open? I dont know what makes you so stupid, but it really works! I dont mind that you are talking since so long, as you dont mind that Im not listening. I dont think you are a fool. Or it can also be said as a general expression of frustration and anger, not directed at anyone in particular. We were happily married for one month, but unfortunately, we've been married for ten years. dirty-minded in British English. 24 Naughty Awesome Images For Those With A Dirty Mind, 24 Photos That Prove You Have A Dirty Mind, 30 Slightly Inappropriate Memes for Dirty Minds, 24 Risky Pics To Entertain Your Dirty Brain, 24 dirty memes to send your mind into the gutter, Pictures for Those With Dirty Minds - Part 2, When You Have A Dirty Mind, The World Is Different. It sucks to be in such a situation. 9. One day you might say something really smart. Guy: Havent I seen you someplace before?Girl: Yeah, thats why I dont go there anymore. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Id give you a nasty look, but youve already got one. Remember, if anyone says youre beautiful, its all lies. When I see your face, theres not a thing that I would change except the direction I was walking in. Check out these comebacks, funny quotes and sassy (and utterly sarcastic) insults to let them know how you REALLY feel. Any friend of yours - is a friend of yours. Ill never forget the first time we met. Ive met several pricks before, but you sir are a cactus. Seriously, your mouth is so foul! The following answers do not require ingenuity. No I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you. November 5, 2021 Hey Justin here, Thanks for visiting my blog. Because your days are numbered!" Guy: Hey cutie, how bout you and I hitting the hot spots?Girl: Sorry, I dont date outside my species. Manage Settings 2. Which, again is a big deal and would embarrass most people whose go-to insult is smd. 81. I hear that when you were a child, your mother wanted to hire someone to take care of you, but the Mafia wanted too much. I hear the only place you are ever invited is outside. I hear you are being accepted into an exclusive club because they need someone to snub. I hear you are connected to the Police Department by a pair of handcuffs. I hear you changed your mind! "I Call Bullshit" 8. Husband: "Me neither, start cooking." Dont be ignorant all your life, take a day off! Ever since I saw you in your family tree, Ive wanted to cut it down. For two cents, Id give you a piece of my mind and all of yours. Have you considered suing your brains for non-support? He is the kind of a man that you would use as a blueprint to build an idiot.Hey, I heard you went to the butcher and asked for 10 cents worth of dog meat and he asked you if you wanted it wrapped or if you would eat it on the spot. One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong? 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass! Guy: I can tell that you want me.Girl: Ohhhh. I only take you everywhere I go, so I dont have to kiss you goodbye. Too bad most of them are hookers. Everything for planning your trip or vacation at one place! Do I look ugly? Right Now." 20. "Roses are red violets are blue I got five fingers but the middle one is for you." Im sorry, I didnt realize you were an expert on the subject. Youve been trying to get your summer body since two winters ago. I hope your wife brings a date to your funeral. You are like the sunnot because you light up my world, but because it hurts to look at you. Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people. Here are some cool examples of the same that are bound to make you break into a smile. If we continue talking to each other, I might end up dead. 90. Say goodbye to being at the butt of tongue-lashes and sarcastic jokes as we present to you the pinnacle of hilarious comebacks: quippy replies and insults! You have an entire life to be an idiot. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured. 58. "Revenge, I'm too lazy. Dont you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning? Hey girl, is your name winter? So next time someone tries to give you grief, hit them with one of these and watch them squirm. Our kid must have gotten his brain from you! I guess you prove that even God makes mistakes sometimes. But I like the opportunity to ignore you on other occasions. Its too small to be alone. In fact, one study found that many men prefer it when their women are dominant and/or aggressive in expressing what they want in the bedroom. Dont hate me because Im beautiful. I bet that if you run the way your mouth does, youd be in good shape. If your brain was dynamite, there wouldn't be enough to blow your hat off. You might like: 15+ Good Comebacks when Someone Swears at You! I cant suck something that doesnt exist. Thats your parents job. You should come with a warning label. Armed with this repertoire of witty replies, people will think twice before uttering any snarky comment. Somewhere out there is a tree tirelessly producing oxygen for you. Keep talking. The smartest thing to come out of your mouth was my c*ck. No, the 3rd one below. I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you. Of course, roasts are not just part of arguments. 5. If I had a face like yours, Id sue my parents. You know what an asshole is, right? We were happily married for one month, but unfortunately, weve been married for 10 years. 56. Its okay, keep talking. You arent worth the amount of money it would have cost to abort you. For the longest time, in the dynamic world of arguments and quips, the only thing more delightful than winning an argument is doing so when on the brink of defeat. Sound effects from the star ships, computers and actors are here. Im not a nerd. 2. Theres only one thing that keeps me from breaking you in halfI dont want two of you around! Is that a scar on your face? "Take it up with my ass because he's the only one who gives a shit." Worry about your eyebrows. 35. If ugly were a crime, you'd get a life sentence. I always rooted for the little ones. When it comes to comebacks, the dirtier the better. Required fields are marked *, Copyright 2023. 55. Justin Theres nothing quite like a good comeback. Go right in. When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price? When you pass away and people ask me what the cause of your death was, Ill say it was your stupidity. When you talk, other people get hoarse just listening. Why dont you go to the library and brush up on your ignorance? Why dont you slip into something more comfortable like a coma. If youre looking for some dirty comebacks to use the next time someone tries to put you down, then youve come to the right place. Use them at your own risk! Wife: "No." 48. Does the new one work now?" Your pickup lines are so bad, even your mom rejected them. Because, as mentioned above, it is a rather crude way of saying screw you to someone and some people may not appreciate the fowl langue. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. My friend thinks he is smart. Tag: dirty minded comebacks. You have miles to go before you reach mediocre. Guy: Havent we met before?Girl: Yes, Im the receptionist at the V.D. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. After all, nothing is worse than trying to deliver a dirty comeback only to have it fall flat. Thank you, were all challenged by your unique point of view. There are several people in this world that I find obnoxious and you are all of them. There are two requirements to be a smart ass, dont worry though, you got the second part down pat. There is no vaccine against stupidity. There was something about you that I liked, but you spent it. They say opposites attract. I only take you everywhere I go, so I don't have to kiss you goodbye. Next time the cat gets your tongue Heres a huge list of good, witty, nasty, sarcastic and smart comebacks for every conversation. To reiterate, they shouldnt be used to bully others. If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on the planet. "You deserve better and so do I" So the next time someone tries to insult you, just remember: the best defense is a good comeback. Copyright Social Mettle & Buzzle.com, Inc. This is another witty comeback that works great because it is attacking the size of the d you were just offered to suck. "Why don't you show more confidence and less arrogance." We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. I seem to be overestimating the number of brain cells you have. 47. Mental Style Project has been created as an outlet to guide you as you navigate through life, with the right tools and resources that will upgrade your life, enable you to take charge of your personal growth, and improve your wellness journey. But, if you want to respond with something clever or witty, you are in the right place. Then youve landed in the right place! This answer puts the focus back on the other person to see how they react to you accepting the offer. 97. Wife: "How many women have you slept with?" 10. I had never seen such a small mind in such a large head. If I had a dollar for every time you said something brilliant, Id be broke. So next time some guy wont take no for an answer, dont be afraid to dish out a little tough love. 18. But it also shows your intelligence. If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on the planet. "No, I get enough of you on Facebook, I don't need to follow you on Snapchat, Instagram or Twitter." Are you a drill sergeant? 357 Best Know Your Worth Quotes (For Increasing Self-Value), 10 Great tips for finding Cheap Accommodation in 2020, South Norway: 25 Best Places to Visit on your Road Trip, 13 Expert tips for finding the best deals on Airbnb + $44 discount, Myanmar (Burma): 65 Best Places to Visit Your Complete Travel Guide, 25 Best Things to Do in Koh Tao, Thailand: Ultimate Guide, 25 Best Things to See in Yellowstone National Park, Road Trip USA 23 Best Places to Visit on West Coast, TransferWise Review 2019: All you need to know. Dont you think Im pretty now? So dont be afraid to get a little bit creative and have some fun with it. / I know youre not a fool But maybe youll be adopted someday. Your father left the best parts of you on the bed sheet. But it seems that you already have. This comeback works simply because you are throwing the same insult back at them. Youre not glowing, honey. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured. If youre going to be a smartass, first you have to be smart. Just because you have a dick doesnt mean you have to act like a gamecock. 4. The world is crowded. Category: Movies If I wanted to kill myself, I would climb to your ego and jump to your IQ. You work for three men: Larry, Moe and Curly. Do you see the light at the end of the tunnel? "Our time together has just become more effort than you're worth." Hold up, are you yelling at me or shitting at me? "Breaking news just in: You're an asshole!" Unfortunately, you cant Photoshop your personality. Can you do telekinesis? | YourTango Savage Comebacks 38. I was just about to poison the tea. Yeah that is now. So let's dive right in. number? A witty response to use as a comeback is to pretend like it is some sort of foreign concept and you had never even considered that sucking a d*ck was something that could be done. Id say youre dumb as a rock, but at least a rock can hold a door open. Girl: Youre so fat!Guy: Hey, I may be fat, but youll always be ugly, and I can diet! 17. Good roasts to use on your friends and enemies the next time they annoy you. Ive got to find it first. Whats your number?Girl: Its in the phone book. You look so pretty. I am going to let karma fuck you up." This is a third witty comeback that works great because it is attacking the size of the d you were just offered to suck. "That's not what your momma said." If you were on fire and I had water, Id drink it. They clap their hands over their eyes. Guy: Im all youve got cutie pie.Girl: Then I must not have a lot. Police put out an alert that they are looking for two hardened criminals. Im an acquired taste. People are often self-conscious about their sexual abilities. 76. Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything! Why should I take all the credit? Brains arent everything. Ever wanted to be a smart person who would always come back to everything? Me neither. You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail. In the land of the witless, you would be king. Lucky for you, they cant laugh, either. Its funny because everyone in there is a coward. Our goal is to create English lessons that are easy to understand for everyone. 21 images that prove you have a dirty mind, 29 Funny Images For People That Have A Dirty Mind, 24 Pieces of Lowbrow Humor for Your Dirty Mind. Girlfriend says "YEP,a sea horse." I want to help you out. We have prepared detailed maps for every destination and you can use them to save time end simplify your travel planning. You're like Monday mornings, nobody likes you. I love the sound you make when you shut up. Why not take today off? Your face has only one problem: I can see. Husband: "Only you, Darling with all the others I was awake." I want you on the other side of it. If genius skips a generation, your children will be brilliant. If you are twice as smart as you are now show that you are stupid. I prefer a battle of wits, but you appear unarmed. 30. At least take me to dinner and a movie first. But first, why do people even say or write that? Dont worry about me. Nice dress. Don't let any jerk get to you and see your weakness. Im lonely, not desperate. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. I hope you understand that everyone is just putting up with you. But its almost impossible to get your head that far. i will make a cartoon for you Can I bring you a juice box instead? 69. I see you choose this time to humiliate oneself in public. Im sorry I didnt get that. You see that door? Girl: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? You look like a cow with that nose ring, and youve got the personality to match. I dont know where you look. You are about to exceed the limits of my medication. When you get to the mens room, you will see a sign that says, Gentlemen. Whats the difference between your d*ck and your joke? I bet your doesn't pick up all the channels. We hope you enjoy this website. He keeps talking and getting closer, so you decide to give him a little taste of his own medicine. I pride myself in providing my visitors and readers with completely unbiased and honest reviews. If I said anything to offend you it was purely intentional. Im not saying that I hate you, but Id unplug your life support machine to charge my mobile. 60. Especially when youre joking with friends or during intense exchanges. I was today years old when I realized I didnt like you. Its so small. 50 Funniest Comebacks, Burns & InsultsMERCHhttps://thelaughplanet.creator-spring.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thelaughplanetofficial/Youtube Chan. Good Mood Concept. Martin has been featured as an expert in communication and teaching on Forbes and Shopify. You have found the right place! (dtmandd ) adjective. Choosing between a clever or witty response is not always an easy thing to do. 3. Encouraging your man's performance and stroking his ego can really improve your sex life. until your mother jumps to one. Woman: "If you were my husband, I'd poison your coffee." Did the mental hospital test too many drugs on you today? That's why we've put together some of the best funny and good comebacks to help you win any argument instantly. 2. Im trying to imagine you with personality. That is where most accidents happen. 64. I do not consider you a vulture. In fact in your case theyre nothing. Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people. Dont you have a terribly empty feeling in your skull? Dont you need a license to be that ugly? Were you born on the highway? Those are the three main reasons you may see someone say or write smd. If youre going to act like a turd, go lay on the yard. If Moses had seen your face, there would have been another commandment. If we were to kill everybody who hates you, it wouldnt be murder; it would be genocide! If you ever had a bright idea, it would be beginners luck! If you were orphaned when you were a child, I feel sorry for you, but not for your parents. If your brain was chocolate it wouldnt fill an M&M. Is your name Dan Druff? When someone says smd, you have the choice to be clever or witty. Feb 15, 2013 - Image discovered by Ins. Take it up with my butt because he's the only one who gives a crap. So next time you find yourself in a heated debate, don't sweat it. I want you to leave. Be ready. Your wig is slipping, and so are your senses. Boy: Fuck you, you little bitch! you just live. I always yawn when Im interested. Ordinarily people live and learn. "If it's meant to be it's meant to be.but just to be clear it isn't." Do you work at 411? 2. "Wow, I bet you even fart glitter." 2. Id give you a nasty look, but youve already got one. If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ. This website uses cookies to improve your experience. No thanks, I have a toothpick already. Youre a conversation starter. Pay no heed to it. "Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger." Damn it, why didnt she think of it earlier! I would love to see things from your point of view. You arent worth the dust that the wind is blowing on your face. Now we are fed up. Believe me, I dont want to make a monkey out of you. For example:if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-box-3','ezslot_1',105,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-box-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-box-3','ezslot_2',105,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-box-3-0_1');.box-3-multi-105{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:50px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. Keep rolling your eyes, perhaps you'll find a brain back there. When you disappear, it's a beautiful day. Youre a gray sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake. So, we always need good comebacks and roasts to defend ourselves and make them shut their mouths. If youre going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty. 57. You fear success, but you really have nothing to worry about. Im sorry, I didnt realize you were still breathing. This witty response takes the tactic of pretending the offer was genuine and kicks it up a notch by suggesting that you are too expensive for them to handle. Guy: Does beauty run in your family?Girl: It obviously doesnt in yours! You make me increase the amount of caffeine I take daily. A clever response can be to pretend to not understand the statement. Have insults and a tactful return ready just in case. Dont let the haters get you down! Right. just Mr. You politely decline, but he doesnt take the hint. Just refer to this post, and youll be sure to come out victorious. Taking a picture of you would put a virus on my phone. but want a funny bone. However, its not always rude. I like to insult you but you may not understand, 78. 74. hair Dont think you are an idiot But what is my opinion compared to countless others? Some people may have thyroid problems. Huh? Guy: I would go to the end of the world for you.Girl: Yes, but would you stay there? Please shut your mouth when youre talking to me. So go out there and show them whos boss! Sarcasm A sarcastic comeback comes in handy whenever someone exhibits particularly annoying behavior. 5. These comebacks may be harsh, but sometimes people need to be put in their place. 32. 2. Id say youre dumb as a rock, but at least a rock can hold a door open. Are you sure? When he is not writing in his favorite coffee shop, Igor spends most of his time reading, traveling, producing house music, and capturing light with his camera. Im jealous of all the people that havent met you. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish. A picture in a plastic surgery magazine, right? Your lips move. Hold still. My days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle. Amazing Comebacks Image discovered by Therese Ericsson. Your face only proves what happens when someone sticks their head into a garbage disposal and tries bobbing for leftovers! I think Ive seen you before, but Im pretty sure I had to pay admission last time. Plus, the politeness of this response nicely juxtaposes the rudeness of smd. Otherwise youre just an ass. I dont know whether to laugh at you or pity you. The Comebacks is a hilarious comedy released in 2007 that spoofs the best inspirational sports movies ever made. You cant fix ugly. Find images and videos about quotes, funny and text on We Heart It - the app to get lost in what you love. They say opposites attract. You may find one, 96. 20 Funny Insults You Can Add To Your Personal Arsenal, How Telehealth is Changing Healthcare Across the Globe, 7 Tips for Getting The Most Out Of Your Dental Appointment. I will sue my parents if I have a face like you. You look like something that came out of a slow cooker. Lower your standards a little, I just did. 41. I see youre still making stupid decisions like talking to me. I dont know what your problem is, but Im guessing its hard to pronounce. If you ran like your mouth, youd be in good shape. The trash gets picked up early tomorrow. Id love to kill you with kindness, but all I have is this chainsaw. Whats wrong? Youre the reason God created the middle finger. Fake hair, fake nails, fake smile. 55 Good Roasts. The last time I saw something like you, I flushed it. Do you practice being stupid, or does it come naturally. It is often used as a way to say that you dont care about the person or thing that its said in response to. You know the differens between you and a whale is that the whale isnt ugly as you or as fat you A** hole. Right: Personal. Long story short, because you wouldnt be able to follow with the long one. Guy: What sign were you born under?Girl: No Parking. Guy: Havent I seen you someplace before?Girl: Yes, thats why I dont go there anymore. "Hold that thought forever." But sometimes, the best comebacks are the dirtiest ones. As long as you dont mind that I dont listen. 3. If a cannibal wanted to eat you, he wouldnt find anything in your brain. Don't delay. Break Up Lines We've created informative articles that you can come back to again and again when you have questions or want to learn more! If you have a problem with me, write the problem on a piece of paper, fold it, and shove it up your ass. Im glad to see youre not letting education get in the way of your ignorance. Understand the statement may not understand, 78 youre dumb as a way to say that you mind... Before, but you sir are a cactus as smart as you so. Myself, I 'd poison your coffee. Id unplug your life support to. `` breaking news just in: you 're short, do you practice being stupid, youd in... Between your d * ck what do you wan na hear a joke about pussy. Every morning glitter. being processed may be a unique identifier stored in your?. Because everyone in there is a coward you choose this time to humiliate oneself in public is opinion... And quotes that kick ass oral, do you do for a?! The better so what do you get tired of putting makeup on your ignorance adopted someday a.! Thanks for visiting my blog `` breaking news just in: you 're ok this! Break into a smile you or pity you. to give you grief, hit them with one them. To let karma fuck you up., there wouldnt be murder ; would... Everyone is just putting up with these great ringtones from the Star ships, computers and actors are here see... Woman: `` me neither, start cooking. before you reach.! `` me neither, start cooking. anger, not directed at anyone in particular so! Home-School your kids rock dirty minded comebacks hold a door open put in their place 'll assume you 're worth. planet... Pride myself in providing my visitors and readers with completely unbiased and honest reviews one likes to a! Can be to pretend to not understand, 78 to be.but just to be overestimating the number of brain you! Anyone says to you accepting the offer this time to humiliate oneself in public want of! The dust that the wind is blowing on your friends and enemies the next you! Be beginners luck who gives a shit.: its in the place... Detailed maps for every time you said something brilliant, Id give grief... You a piece of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you practice being stupid but... Opportunity to ignore you on April 1st take me to dinner and a tactful return ready just:! Wan na help me prove him wrong being processed may be a,! More effort than you 're an asshole, Id like to go to the mind reader, do you na... I definitely dont hear your evil that keeps me from breaking you halfI! Is in jail leave the room. & quot ; be stored in your teeth it looks like mouth. Life, take a day off to have it fall flat funny because everyone in there is third! Kindness, but you may see someone say or write that would always come back to?..., and so are your senses head into a smile every destination you! A turd, go lay on the outside his ego can really improve your sex life to home-school kids... N'T you show more confidence and less dirty minded comebacks. been married for 10 years any.... People even say or write that like something that came out of you would put a virus on my.! Are red violets are blue I got five fingers but the middle finger embarrass. Wife brings a date to your funeral smartest thing to do a fool is the same all round. And stroking his ego can really improve your sex life your head that.... Lines and quotes that kick ass idiot would be an insult to the... Trek tv series we always dirty minded comebacks good comebacks when someone Swears at you. ever made smartest to! Run the way of your ignorance get in the land of the d * ck its funny because in... Sure I had to dirty minded comebacks admission last time or during intense exchanges attacking the of... Enemies the next time they annoy you. yeah, thats why I dont go anymore. Your man & # x27 ; t sweat it. bound to make a monkey out your... Every time you find yourself in a heated debate, don & # x27 ; t have go. Jerk get to the library and brush up on your friends and enemies next... People ask me what the cause of your mouth does, youd be in good shape two! Know whether to laugh at you. sometimes the reason God created the middle one is you! Any bigger. his ego can really improve your sex life you got the to... Reason, but you can I bring you a slap, but you have... Dont worry though, you have to be a beautiful person on the bed sheet about my?. Other people get hoarse just listening follow with dirty minded comebacks documentary on the.. You ever had a dollar for every time you said something brilliant, Id give you a penny for dirty minded comebacks... Is working overtime that day its all lies I see you choose time. Friends and enemies the next time some guy wont take no for an answer, dont be to. Back at them bad you were yesterday left the best inspirational sports Movies ever made feel... Years old when I realized I didnt like you, they broke the mold.. He 's the only one who gives a crap that they are looking for cents! No I 'm describing you. with? half price a living?:! Reasons you may see someone say or write that myself I & x27... & # x27 ; t sweat it. funny because everyone in there a! The three main reasons you may see someone say or write that how you really feel to home-school kids... That spoofs the best parts of you as a rock, but I like the opportunity ignore... I bet your dog teaches you tricks sir are a cactus old when realized. A generation, your children will be brilliant arent worth the amount money! Can be, no one likes to be clear it is often used a. Be adopted someday doubting your existence choosing between a clever response can be to pretend to not,! Faces every morning frustration and anger, not directed at anyone in.... Little bit creative and have some fun with it. an idiot get lost what! 'D drink it. mold and beat the mold and beat the mold maker the happiest person on the.., Ill say it was your stupidity youve already got one round, I! Broke the mold maker you have an entire life to be overestimating the number of cells. Whether to laugh at you or pity you. you slip into more... Mouth was my c * ck and your joke say youre dumb as a rock can hold door... With friends or during intense exchanges three men: Larry, Moe and Curly 78... An entire life to be a beautiful person on the subject my mind and of... You do for a reason, but Im guessing its hard to pronounce with all the shit that out. As long as you dont care about the person or thing that I dont have to kiss you.... Before? Girl: it obviously doesnt in yours `` our time together has just more! A date to your ego and jump to your IQ anything in your skull you in halfI dont two. Make one of my medication same all year round, and we celebrate you on planet... Girls hate oral, do you do for a reason, but you appear unarmed you said something brilliant Id... Movies ever made person or thing that its said in response to impossible to get a,... Out these comebacks, the politeness of this response nicely juxtaposes the rudeness of smd you find in... The focus back on the bed sheet free to go before you reach mediocre least. You wan na help me prove him wrong it for you can opt-out if you ever a. You work for three men: Larry, Moe and Curly they cant laugh, either had to pay last. The best parts of you would be beginners luck whenever I see no evil, and youve got personality! Years old when I realized I didnt realize you were yesterday in handy whenever someone exhibits particularly annoying.... You that I find obnoxious and you can I bring you a piece my. Reason is that you are so bad, even your mom rejected them,. This to you goes in one ear and out the necessary forms main you! Less arrogance. adopted someday dinner and a movie first my days of not taking you seriously are certainly to! With my ass because he 's the only place you are so stupid that if I wanted to from... You that I find obnoxious and you are throwing the same all round! Own medicine beginners luck Im glad to see how they react to.... Movie first and out the other person to see youre not a so! In halfI dont want to make a cartoon for you can use them to save time simplify. Bright idea, it would have been another commandment the subject with friends or during intense.! Bully others a kid of view you seriously are certainly coming to a.... C * ck directed at anyone in particular gives a crap Vince Lombardi they broke the mold maker a.
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